Stop thinking too much. I eat my flesh and stink of myself. I want to overdose with anger and forget my polite misery. Fuck the system. It doesn’t work. I miss just letting go. I want to let go. Give into me. Have sex with me. I’m so desperately pathetic. But only I know that. Whirling sparkles in my brain blind yours. I can obviously manipulate the hell our of you, I just don’t know how. I can’t even manipulate myself. Never could. Sometimes I need to. Just to get out of it all. When you’re choking life doesn’t wait for you to catch your breath. That sucks big time. That’s the only set back. You can escape death, but you can’t escape life. Nothing is really up to you, everything is a series of events, a repeat of a pattern. Even your own behaviour, your whole existance. You never really change so just stop running away. What scares you is always gonna come back.
Note to self: Use 2008 to resolve that.